Hello guys, gals, aliens or whoever you might be out there. Life’s back into its normal routines except it’s just a little bit better. We’ve managed to get our house fully in order now, and finally I have a washer and dryer in my home again. I know that sounds lame and totally boring, but all the moms (parents) out there who have experienced multiple kids and having to use the laundry mat, are feeling me right now. So if you don’t get it than you probably haven’t been there and that’s ok, take this as a little advice and have a washer and dryer in your home if you’re going to have kids……write that down “Must have washer and dryer before baby.” Your life will be much easier in the long run.
Ok, I promise I won’t continue to bore you with laundry talk. I’m more here in an effort to clear my head, I admit a lot of decision making has been going on around here. My mind is cluttered with things like go back to school or sale my own stuff? Should I cut wheat out of our diet? What school should my daughter be going to? Should we be eating more fruits or vegetables?…. and so many more.
We all know that life as a whole is riddled with decisions, from the time you can make one the roller coaster begins. Sometimes, they are as simple as matching a pair of socks and sometimes it’s as hard as trying to decide between life and death. Not only are we faced with plenty of decisions to make but we are also often judged on the calls we make. This in many cases only makes your job that much harder.
Once you become a parent, it’s even worse because now your decisions effect way more than just yourself. Your food choices aren’t just about you, nor are your clothes, time or anything else for that matter. Your life and decisions mostly revolve around your child (children). The pressure of it all can be very intense, from time to time it can be down right out stressful. However, we get the job done, from the little choices to the big ones.
Yes, it’s true that we don’t always make the best, or right decision. There are times that we all wish we could change a bad decision, but it’s those mistakes that teach us to be better next time. If we didn’t fail every once in a while then we would be terrible prideful people, more than likely full of hate. I think the world would do well to remember that perfect isn’t truly perfect. Imperfection is perfection. It’s the flaws, mistakes and missteps that make us who we are. Of course sometime they are not always our own mistakes, but nonetheless it makes us…..us.
Now I’m not saying this is all we are made of, or that it all works out. Life is not black and white, or simply right or wrong. I’m sure some of you may feel that it is and that’s fine for you, but we must live in different worlds because mine is colored in a million different shades. No meaningful decision, or choice is made with a light heart, or without looking at every angle I can take into consideration.
This isn’t a normal topic I’d feel the need to write about but recently I’ve been watching people break their backs over decisions that aren’t truly that meaningful. I’m sure it means something to them but over all, these things are not worth anyone pulling their hair out over.
I’ve been looking through mommy blogs, groups and pages (like Cafemom, The Mom Life on facebook and few others, the last couple days.) I watching as moms (parents) discuss, fight and even harass each other over simple topics that no one should be fighting over. Having time to watch this and think it over, I’ve come to the conclusion that research, companies, and yes even some doctors can be a bad thing. Parents are out their crying, depressed, overly stressed and just miserable with all the choices that are being put in front of them. Let me try to example this for you so I know we are on the same page here.
Example: (you feel like you’re in school right now, don’t you? Hahahaha)
Mary the mother of a soon to be 1yr old is ready to start considering what milk to give her child. When she was little it would have been cow’s milk but since having a child – she has been riddled with information on how bad it is and a lot of her mother friends don’t use it. She’s asked the doctor, but isn’t sure if she agrees with his opinions on the matter. Now she’s becoming more stressed as the time approaches for her to decide, and she’s been to every site out there – comparing the pro and cons of all the nonfat, low fat, nonmilk, goat milk, coconut milk, etc..
This mother is stressed out and likely losing sleep over the kind of milk she should give her child. This to me, is insane. No matter what she decides, the child’s going to be ok! The chances of that child dying because she gave the child soy milk over cows is very unlikely, and I mean VERY! I understand that we want to do best for our children, but we don’t have to push ourselves to the edge while trying to do it. It’s as simple as common sense people, you can do some research and make an informed decisions. What you can’t do is feels bad because other mothers (parents) don’t do it the same way.
If you decide that cow’s milk is just fine for your child, because it was good enough for you and you turned out alright…then that’s great. That’s your decision, it’s your choice and you’re doing what you feel is best for your family. What I’m trying to get at here is that none of us should feel pressured into the decisions we make. If you’re making decision for your child by what everyone else is doing or saying, you’re going to likely regret it in the end.
Don’t make yourself feel overwhelmed, it’s certainly not worth it. Women have been giving birth for a very long time, and parents have been raising kids for just as long time…..the world is in no way lacking in people. I do believe we can handle it without all the fuss. If people could survive with so little back then, and do it without being a giant mess – then I know we can as well.
To end my rant I’d like to say that if you feel it’s the right move for your family, then don’t worry about what everyone else thinks. Worrying about what others think is, and has been, the root of some many problems – not only in our lives but in the world as well. It’s ok to do things different, it’s ok to parent different, and it’s ok to be proud of the choices you make, even if your friends do it differently, or think differently. Just be you and do the best you can for your family and yourself, in the end, your life will be much simpler, and a whole lot happier.
Peace out for now to whoever is out there.